“We are condemned to be free”
– Sartre
Condemned, because once thrown into the world we are responsible for every single thing we do. In contrary to Plato’s and Aristotle’s beliefs that we are all born with an ‘essence’ (;a preexisting set of characteristics that cause the way we behave and the paths we take in life = essentialism), Sartre, with his existentialist approach, believed we are born without an essence and therefore without a meaning. According to him, life is a dynamic process in which people define themselves by their actions and choices. Existence precedes essence. Therefore the meaning of life is whatever you decide is meaningful to you. It sounds simple but according to Sartre, in order to stick to our authentic self, we constantly have to fight off other people’s perceptions of us. Which makes finding meaning in the things we do an exhausting process.
We try to find meaning and identity in our jobs, our relationships and our hobbies (in the best case in all three at the same time) and when we find it, it creates a big energy boost. It makes us feel purposeful and content with ourselves. Conversely, if we can’t find meaning in the things we do, we feel drained and dissatisfied. In that case there’s no reason to continue shooting our energy in that direction. To prevent this feeling of meaninglessness from happening, we are often meticulously weighing out our options and catastrophizing the effects they will have on our futures. Because of all the important decisions we have to overthink (which products to buy, which job to take, which relationships to maintain), anxiety has taken a permanent place in our spectrum of emotions.
So if Sartre is right and there are no expectations of us (but the ones we put on ourselves) and there is ultimately no meaning, why would we still get out of bed in the morning and face all the people that try to change us and rob us from our authenticity?
I’m sure you’ve had these kind of realizations before when you compared yourself to the endlessly vast universe behind the stars visible at night. You concluded you where small and insignificant. But this time, instead of getting all gloomy about it, think about how equally small and insignificant the decisions are you have to take in life. How little effect they have in the grand scheme of things, and how weird it is that such small things cause you to lie awake at night. Think about what a relief it is that our actions have very little impact to anyone else but to ourselves. With this approach meaninglessness is humbling, optimistic and free of pressure.
Taking a look at the big picture, and no longer letting it fill you with dread.